When I fell in love with my husband many years ago I was completely taken by how funny he was and how smart, handsome, athletic and interesting. It was a whirlwind romance fueled by fun and passion. Biology had descended on me in a big way. Genetically he was a match and my body said YES!

The problem with all this is that when the fires all simmer down do you have the right stuff? In our case we still have the humor, the same moral compass and  can “get along”.  We are a cute couple! What is missing is that he doesn’t recognize me as an individuated person. Odd but he sees us as a couple and him as an individual but ignores me as an individual. The net result has been a lot of isolation and loneliness on my end. Emotional abandonment? Yes. Very sad.

Intimacy. In-to-me-you-see. Lack of it has been our undoing.